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Size Matters….


Preface:

Those who belong to this unique club, personalize it yourself – Think of you as “I” wherever used in this blog. This Biographical account is a Matter of FAT…Ooopss Matter of FACT. Take offense at your own risk – remember you will be ticking off a 100 kg+ mass.

Body (No Pun intended)

I am a guy (all my friends vouch for it) whose weight in Kgs almost matches (or exceeds) number of friends I have on Facebook (over 5K).

The website of Art of Living founded by His Holiness Sri Sri Ravishankar ji popularly known as the Guru of Joy says, it is spread over 152 countries. I also have have matching number to claim some fame – I have 152 kgs of force acting on me towards the centre of the earth.

I cannot but help be reminded of that skeleton hanging from the hook in the Biology lab, when I see some skinny friends who call themselves fit – Baaahhhh.

People as skinny as a skeleton do not look healthy

As I grew up they also reminded me of those skimpy clothes that move around on FTV. I always thought it was just those 2-3 pieces of rags moving on stage till some one said there are humans inside it. I love when these people give me those very adorable admiring looks 😉 **Blush…blush**

I had this “Fats-Challenged” Size Zero poor soul who tried to poke fun about that lovely little paunch. Reader, tell me if a paunch smaller than that Hill where Sumeru Mantap is situated is a Paunch especially an on a lovely chiselled physical structure?

Is a pot belly really not healthy?

I challenged her if she has as much muscles in her entire body? (a friendly Doctor – Swami Hardik of my club asks me to refer it as Muscle, I have to agree that it is medically appropriate too). And she wears clothes that are as costly (if not more) though she just was wearing 1/10th of what I was wearing.

And here is an open challenge. I can hug anyone single handedly. Those Size-zeroes need to assemble ten of them in a Sam-Gachatvam circle to get around me. So who is more enviroment friendly? What a single person like me can do, needs 10 to do. HUGs… and I tell you, when we Hug, it indeed is a real HUG they get!!!

A hug is good for health and happiness also...

Some advantage (those skinny ones call it is unfair and envy me for this) – I never suffer from what some Not-Obese starlets refer to as “food-martyrdom” I mean I dont belong to those folks who say (or atleast think) Oh! No I should not have eaten that extra topping of cheeze on my Pizza, or Which devil had taken over me that I ate that slab of chocolate.

As my Guruji …err Gurudev (after an earlier blog by Aparazzi, I have to say Gurudev, BTW! she very nearly belongs to my club and empathises with my feelings here) HH Sri Sri Ravishankar ji of Art of Living Foundation says – Serve to your capacity and a bit more. I follow it to the “T”. I serve … to the brink of the capacity of my plate and more… Very Obedient follower, Am I not?

Too much food is not good for your health

Why I am popular with the kids. Kids never have to worry about getting bruised by the bones when they sit on your lap, like they do when they sit on laps of say Sumathi or Ashwin. What they experience is a royally cushioned unbeatable comfort on my lap – and as a bonus a reclining cushion (others call it a paunch)

Suresh is happy with himself

Another  reason why I love every gram of my bulk because my Obesity acts as a “Friend Filter” – Do I need to be friend with someone who cannot ACCEPT ME AS I AM?”

I am mortally scared of Tattooing (rather getting Tattooed) On a trip abroad, while everyone in the team was being forced by the gracious host (yes, Size Zero guy) to get a body Tattoo done at his cost, I was excused – because I had a large body surface to Tattoo (read – the host to dig his pocket into an abyss)

And now, instead of fighting my bulge (did it for so many years successfully – fighting it I mean) I decided to indulge. Only way to fight bulge is to indulge 😉

Another great part – I get tailored dresses not those run-of-the-mill stuff that you guyz/gals pick up as Readymade from local shop.Trying to find clothes to fit me is like a treasure hunt for my wife 😉

Evolution from Laptop to Belly-Top – Now how many of you have this luxuy?

Spiritual knowledge also makes one creative..

I could go on and on about why being Obese or fat is a virtue, but Editors don’t allow the luxury with Words that I take with my weight. So signing off…. with my LAST (BUT ONE) WORD! (I always keep a reserve of Capacity + More)

I can eat what I want, when I want and how muchever I want (the very reason I got here in the first place)

And Final Final Advantage of being FAAATTTTT!!!! Beat this…

Long Love Obesity!!

PS: Copyrights of the Pictures/Video with Respective Owners – If in violation please let us know and we would promptly take it off. (However, read the preface – you will do it at risk of offending a 100kg+ bulk)

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19 Comments

Posted by on July 24, 2012 in Others, Yoga and Meditation

 

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INSTALLING HUSBAND…..


A woman writes to the IT Technical support Guy :
Dear Tech Support,

Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and I noticed a distinct slowdown in the overall system performance, particularly in the flower and jewellery applications, which operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0.

In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs, such as Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5, and then installed undesirable programs such as NEWS 5.0,MONEY 3.0 and CRICKET 4.1 .

Conversation 8.0 no longer runs, and Housecleaning 2.6 simply crashes the system.
Please note that I have tried running Nagging 5..3 to fix these problems, but to no avail.
What can I do?

Signed,……………………

Very soon the following Reply came from the IT support team :

DEAR Madam,

First, keep in mind, Boyfriend 5.0 is an Entertainment Package,
while Husband 1.0 is an operating system.

Please enter command: ithoughtyoulovedme. html and try to download
Tears 6.2 and do not forget to install the Guilt 3.0 update.

If that application works as designed, Husband1.0 should then automatically
run the applications Jewellery 2.0 and Flowers 3.5..

However, remember, overuse of the above application can cause
Husband 1.0 to default to Silence 2.5 or Beer 6.1.

Please note that Beer 6.1 is a very bad program that will download the Snoring Loudly Beta.

Whatever you do, DO NOT under any circumstances install
Mother-In-Law 1.0 (it runs a virus in the background that will eventually seize control of all your system resources.)

In addition, please do not attempt to reinstall the Boyfriend 5.0 program. These are unsupported applications and will crash
Husband 1.0.

In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have limited memory and cannot learn new applications quickly.
You might consider buying additional software to improve memory and performance. We recommend: Cooking 3.0 and Hot Looks 7.7.

Good Luck Madam!

IT SUPPORT DESK

Submitted by Art of Living Blogger, Rajkumar Bhatnagar

 
2 Comments

Posted by on July 4, 2012 in Others

 

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Keep Smiling :-)


Administrator(s)! I hope you have just got out of your meditation after Kriya – and highest state of “accept (and approve) the blog as it is…”

Even straws practice Yoga!

I start with an answer to a question a whole lot of my friends (surprised at how I suddenly changed since 1998) – Why so spiritual and amidst a busy schedule “Breathe” spirituality the Art of Living way. Answer is simple – I enjoy it. For those who know me, if it was only hard work (or even work-outs), I would be far away from it. So Sadhana (no, no! not a girl) as in Spiritual practices continues to be fun, despite my slim figure – “O” is a figure too, isn’t it?

As His Holiness Sri Sri Ravishankar rightly said God loves fun (Oye… me too) and Spirituality is not that quagmire of complicated words that I otherwise heard for most part of my life. Hence I chose to make trips to the Art of Living centres and avoid repeated trips to Medical diagnostic labs with samples in bottles.

Some Personal experiences with Yoga

With years of practice of Yoga today I gradually stretch to conclusions and don’t jump to it.

Oh yes! The best part that I am able to stretch the best is my Jaws. Research says average biting force of the human jaw is 162 PSI! And Boy…with such a workout that I give it, mine is atleast 5 times more

More facts on the biting force of various teeth – maximal biting force values of incisor, bicuspid, and first molar of all the males were 43.3kg, 99.11kg, and 120.66kg. (the last two pretty much matches my weight)

The other exercise that I practice with unfailing regularity was “Taking my Hands from the Plate to Mouth” and again and again… I can do this for hours together. The reason why instead of increasing Weights (during Weight training), I increased my Waist.

Kashiji/Kamleshji – Just a question – if I was supposed to touch my knees with nose, God would have placed knees would be on my palms no? Well! that is the only part that can easily reach the tip of my nose (for now I can reach my nose with my hands – thank God! not too much of a distance between mouth and nose)

After the Yogathon 2012, my body gave me a gentle reminder of every single bone, joint and muscle that exist in me (other than the only two that I always was aware – jaws and hand). Namaste….One…Two. Those counts still ring in my ears.

Finally it would do good to know that it is far more important for a smile to spread over your chin than it is to get your chin closer to your shin.

Remember! Life is hard. It’s breathe, breathe, breathe … all the time. This is what Art of Living and staying “Within” is all about.

 

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